122. 134. I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. When you fall, I will be there to catch you with love. 115. 150. You don't say "Make it work" when somebody clearly has it figured out. I’m not trying to convince the world I have a life.” Our collection of funny quotes which are short, easy to remember but still hilarious “All my life I tho […] They say ‘don’t try this at home’ so I’m coming over to your house to try it. Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once. 142. Wouldn’t exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them? The best things in life are free. IRS: We’ve got what it takes to take what you have got. – Robert A. Heinlein Remember: Don’t Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river. Run. 175. 84. 80. I really should do something with my life, maybe tomorrow. God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. It is always to nice celebrate the birthday of your loved ones with nice and meaningful quotes that will make them feel that they are loved and cared for. Looking for popular girly quotes and sayings? Funny Winter Status. 197. Wouldn’t exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them? You kill vegetarian vampires with a steak to the heart. 13. lol (THIS IS JUST A JOKE!) Source(s): https://snipurl.im/aYUmX. I’m sorry that I’m not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse. 127. 119. 114. 75 Funny Farmer Slogans and Sayings. I’m not running away from hard work, I’m too lazy to run. Hope is a waking dream. Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. 205. He’s dreaming too. Sheree sure knows how to start a fight. What is the tallest building in the entire world? Envelope. I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed. I did not trip and fall. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife’s mother. Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. 18. Art doesn’t transform. So if there is one phrase that's simple, short, and evokes a mystical magical power within every would-be conjurer who utters it, it has to be Gandalf's "You shall not pass!" My ex boyfriend said this to me to be funny. 209. Because their teacher told them it was a piece of cake. Pythagoras. I have Alzheimer’s bulimia, first I eat everything in sight and then I forget to puke. 161. Bowling Alley: Please be quiet. I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying. 50. – Wilson Mizner 65. 22. Get Lost 89. Funny Catch Phrases. Making everyone angry, piece of cake. I have Alzheimer’s bulimia, first I eat everything in sight and then I forget to puke. You know, the one who only speaks in movie quotes — possibly only in movie quotes from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.Sure, that guy is an annoying jerk, but we all have those bits of dialogue from our favorite movies that stick with us, which catch on to our attention and follow us out into the world. Enjoy our latest, fresh, still warm funny sayings for the year 2020! I don’t like morning people, or mornings, or people. Relationships these days start by pressing LIKE on her photo. Our goal is to score goals Some call them opponents, I call them Friends Born to play soccer Talk with your eyes play with […] People say you can’t live without love, but I think oxygen is more important. 152. If you have crazy friends you have everything you’ll ever need. If Cinderella’s shoe fit perfectly, then why did it fall off? 210. 98. 76. 25. I bet giraffes don’t even know what farts smell like. It’s alright if you don’t agree with me, I can’t force you to be right. Wit helps us see the absurdity in the most serious situations, and is hence important in life everyday. You can write them down and use them whenever you’re attending a social event or if you simply just want to make yourself laugh. 163. 193. 133. Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late. Because someone is always sitting on the deck. 216. Photo: Shutterstock. We have a connection. Short Funny Quotes. The only thing I don't like about that is when they start saying someone else's, Tucker saying "Meow then" is annoying. 149. 18 / 20. 93. 15. Today, I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can skip the gym. 256. These great funny farmer slogans and sayings highlight the invaluable contributions and hard work of the agriculture industry. 25. Don’t give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer. You’re born free, then you’re taxed to death. We all know that guy. I'm giving you one more chance to not be an idiot. – Socrates. Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now that’s confusing. A while back in 2013 I made a video about funny football catchphrases. Enter your email address to get the best tips and advice. 182. 220. My diet for today: 1% food, 99% Halloween candy. Since not all of us are blessed with the ability to throw a joke the right way, we thought of helping you out by giving you these ridiculously short funny quotes. 8. 54. An obstacle is often a stepping stone. I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. Just because RuPaul thinks you're not worthy, that doesn't mean he wants you to leave without putting your hips into it. Sincerely, opportunist. If at first, you don’t succeed, so much for skydiving. Pampered cows produce spoiled milk. – Helen Giangregorio 75. 265. 205. I don’t suffer from insanity. I used to have winter fat but now I have spring rolls. Smiles are contagious, be a carrier. He who wakes up early, yawns all day long. 119. 37. 10. 259. Yeah, so is a grenade. It’s not important to win, it’s important to make the other guy lose. To discover more amazing secrets about living your best life, click here to follow us on Instagram! 148. Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you’re done. Why did the school kids eat their homework? My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. – Frances McDormand 4. Honestly, we don't care if any of it is as spontaneous as it seems. If nothing is impossible is it possible for something to be impossible? 86. For more funny phrases, check out these 50 cheesy pick-up lines guaranteed to get a laugh. If you steal from one author, it’s plagiarism; if you steal from many, it’s research. Give me a photo of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas. – Pat Sajak 2. 86. When someone is oversharing their vast knowledge. Decomposing. 52. 7. Why do they call it beauty sleep when you wake up looking terrible? – Dave Barry What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? 249. He who wakes up early, yawns all day long. Compare The Market meerkat. Sebastian Gendry is a change-maker, coach and consultant with a passion for laughter. 174. 168. Life is always rocky when you’re a gem. I’ve made it from the bed to the couch. Don’t worry, the spider is smaller than you. 44. It’s called tomorrow. 103. Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can’t see. The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep. 17. 168. What do you get when you cross a fish and an elephant? Common sense is like deodorant, those who need it the most never use it. 105. I’m not here to judge, I’m just pointing out all the mistakes you’re making. To make time fly, throw your watch out the window. 2. 108. Any Others? We're still pretty sure that American Idol host Randy Jackson was making it up as he went along—by "pitchy" wasn't he really saying "just sing it better? It's hard to explain why we find this favorite comeback by Bethenny Frankel so satisfying. Yeah, so is a grenade. 134. Just like every Monday does on Earth. 132. 16. / Funny Quotes / Funny Phrases and Slogans That Will Crack You Up. The library, because it has so many stories. Easy to read short quotations by famous authors and anonymous. A catchphrase is what the villager says at the END of their dialog. When nothing is going right, go left. I don’t go crazy, I am crazy. 68. 121. – Prescott Bush There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. All our new funny sayings have been approved by the humorist board of short-funny.com. I eat cake because it’s someone’s birthday somewhere today. 46. 215. 142. Behold! You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools. 3. The only power you have is the word ‘no’. Because their teacher told them it was a piece of cake. I’m not arguing, I’m just telling you why you’re wrong. (There weren’t any pigs there.) – Flip Wilson How do trees access the internet? 210. Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now that’s confusing. 184. 252. – Chris Rock Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings series is an absolute gold mine of quotes, phrases, and other quips and blurbs that bring to mind thoughts of Middle Earth, swords, daggers, dragons, dwarves, and other fantasy imagery. 225. I’m old enough to know better, but young enough to do it anyway. Stop texting me in the middle of texting you, now I have to change my text. 56. – Bill Murray 97. Nov 6, 2018 Nov 8, 2018 by Brandon Gaille. Your eyes water when you yawn, because you miss your bed and it makes you sad. Required fields are marked *, Below is a list of research studies that are currently open for participation. 220. A mind is like a parachute. 2. To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. 6. When they go away, it’s a brighter day. Sometimes the ‘M’ is silent. 170. 85. Sorry, I didn’t pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone. So whether it’s for self-motivation, your next t-shirt design or simply for your Instagram bio, this collection of short quotes is full of powerful ideas packed into tiny little packages of words. I’m not here to judge, I’m just pointing out all the mistakes you’re making. Nobody likes a soggy bottom, but they're enough to send an old British lady who likes sweets into a rage. How can you not like someone who can make you laugh? Top 70 Cute And Funny Girly Quotes 1. If lying was a job some people would be billionaires. No, but April may. I solemnly swear that I am up to no good. 212. Funny Catch Phrases. 166. Really? Fun/Funny Catchphrases for Villagers; User Info: MuttonBasher. 211. - Erin Heatherton 2. Auf Wiedersehen!" I’ve been doing nothing for years. I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode. 208. From decoration, invitations and greeting people, creepy and funny Halloween catch phrases play a big role. 120. I know that I am intelligent, because I know that I know nothing. – Paul Ehrlich 228. 55. Yesterday I did nothing and today I’m finishing what I did yesterday. .People who enjoy making other people laugh are also known to be more detail oriented. My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry. Swimming trunks. What is the tallest building in the entire world? You can only be young once. 1. Photo: Shutterstock. 167. 137. 133. 11. 120. I used to have winter fat but now I have spring rolls. Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. Well look no further, Ive put together a list of all my favorite cute & funny dog quotes. Because seven “ate” nine. Live what you love. – Benjamin Franklin. Everything you can imagine is real. 4. I didn’t want to interrupt her. 159. Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else. 57. 64. – Bill Murray Some people are like clouds. You were too lazy to read that number. A bargain is something you don’t need at a price you can’t resist. We need to hear a pin drop. 93. 236. Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn’t contain any calories. On Mercury, a day lasts 1,408 hours. Don’t make me laugh, I’m trying to be mad at you. He’s dreaming too. Time is the soul of this world. "Finland!" 149. – Rodney Dangerfield, 198. It makes them so damned mad. Can February march? 239. 163. The best things in life are free. My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it. 88. – Steven Alexander Wright – Ann Landers, 244. It has nothing new to tell you. (, "You've got too much of a soggy bottom." And laughter truly is the best medicine for your soul. You can stop driving me crazy, I can walk from here. – Albert Einstein. ‘Alright, get in the basket.’ I believe we should all pay our tax bill with a smile. – Socrates. 141. 43. Here are just 30 of our favorite funny catchphrases from the long and rich history of reality television. Nine out of ten people love chocolate, and the 10th person is always lying. 209. I didn’t mean to push all your buttons, I was just looking for the mute button. 223. – Sam Levenson. Because it was soda pressing. I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. I tell you what always catches my eye. You were too lazy to read that number. You definitely don’t want to kill the vibe by throwing a bad joke out there! Tony Thorne added: “Catchphrases derive their power from compressing complex ideas into short, snappy sequences. 269. Marriage is like a walk in the park, Jurassic Park. Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. Patrick Star 1. 100. 1. Enjoy! It can get you out of a tight corner and people who lack a sense of humor cannot do. 224. Awesome Short Funny Quotes About Life to Make You Laugh “I don’t broadcast every high & I don’t hide every low. 173. 235. When the past comes knocking, don’t answer. The early bird catches the worm, eats more and dies sooner. Seeing a spider in my room isn’t scary. 191. Always follow your heart, but remember to bring your brain along. 228. If nothing is impossible is it possible for something to be impossible? 85. 113. How can you not like someone who can make you laugh? If Monday had a face, I would punch it. They make total sense but with a pinch of humor. 195. See more ideas about funny catch phrases, catch phrase, funny. 77. 35. 128. 38. Anonymous. 279. The weirder they are, the more we love them. TV Shows. Art doesn’t transform. 54. After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says W T F. 204. 206. – Bill Murray I wasn’t mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I’m mad.. yes, I’m mad! All Rights Reserved. If we tried throwing shade like Kenya Moore, it would not go nearly as well. My goal this weekend is to move, just enough so people don’t think I’m dead. 26. Great people are often people of few words. My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. Life always offers you a second chance. I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot. My goal this weekend is to move, just enough so people don’t think I’m dead. Whoever said great things come in small packages hasn’t seen my big screen TV. 113. You know you are lazy when you get excited about canceling your plans. 45. No matter how bad it gets I’m always rich when I go to the … 186. Not many people watched it, so I am reposting it for your viewing pleasure. Here are 75 short jokes anyone can remember! Every wall is a door. Your email address will not be published. 159. If you can’t remember my name, just say ‘chocolate’ and I’ll turn around.. 271. Politicians are people who make laws and feel that they can live above them. If only common sense were more common. 201. 212. You were too lazy to read that number. 148. What do you call a bear with no teeth? But you can always be immature. We don't know. 204. Soccer Slogans Life is like soccer, we need GOALS What a kick!!! 276. Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. They planet. 244. 242. 181. 247. 90. 49. Why can’t you play cards on a small boat? Enjoy our latest, fresh, still warm funny sayings for the year 2020! Share them with your friends. – Robert Bloch. 222. Yes, officer, I saw the speed limit, I just didn’t see your car. It’s scary when it disappears. My dream job would be the Karma delivery service. I eat cake because it’s someone’s birthday somewhere today. 8. 224. My silence spoke a thousand words, but you never heard them. 239. 123. Breasts don’t have eyes. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? Luvze® is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? Below are the 75 Creative & Catchy Health Slogans. 195. 51. I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry. – Stuart Turner And if you’re looking for even more dog quotes don’t forget to check out our list of the 100 best dog inspired quotes. 35. Deep Short Quotes. 156. 58. First, the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a no bell prize. Here are some of silliest, sweetest, and strangest things kids said this week: 145. 230. When life closes a door, just open it again. Me And My Friend Made Up One. – Alison Boulter. All the arts we practice are apprenticeship. It's likely that without this mnemonic device, the boys from Jersey Shore would've totally left out something on their "gym, tan, laundry" to-do list. Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday? Ralph Waldo Emerson. I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle. 267. Home: Where I can look ugly and not care. God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. 64. Nobody gets out alive anyway. One thing you need to remember though; if you are going to be funny, then make sure you’re actually funny. You can’t have everything, where would you put it? 12 / 20. I’m sorry, but that’s just the way I am. How do astronomers organize a party? 192. Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late. Be strong, I whispered to my WiFi signal. ~ Groucho Marx~ She was what we used to call a suicide blond - dyed by her own hand. 128. Seeing a spider in my room isn’t scary. It doesn’t work if it is not open. 153. 42. Love your enemies. My room is like the Bermuda triangle, stuff goes in and is never seen again. I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle. I intend to live forever. For the rest of civilization, the absence of swine is a prerequisite of a good place. Sorry, I didn’t pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone. 5. I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. I hate Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays. – Franklin Jones, 259. 2. 179. ~ Henry A. Kissinger~ Military justice is to justice what military music is to music. Never ask a starfish for directions. If you steal from one author, it’s plagiarism; if you steal from many, it’s research. If Monday had a face, I would punch it. ‘Oh sheet!’ – Steven Wright, 252. What funny catchphrases have you given your villagers? If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else. Don’t worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else. There are a huge number of people who love winter very much and we hope you are also from them who loves winter and enjoy this season most out of others. catchphrase, he gave a little plug to one of his movies. A bald spot is like a lie, the bigger it gets the harder it is to cover it up. 84. I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry. 44. Seek the seeker. ~ Saul Bellow~ I used to be Snow White, but I drifted. All you need is love. Born out of Hebrew and German, Yiddish has many unique words and phrases that are used to give humor, sarcasm, and joy in the moment as needed. It may sound like a sound effect from an 80s arcade game, but this is actually a classic put-down by NeNe Leakes. "Leedle leedle leedle lee!" 36. 79. In the morning, I can’t get up. It can get you out of a tight corner and people who lack a sense of humor cannot do. The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. 257. In this round the first player or team to shout and get the correct answer wins. 199. Yesterday I did nothing and today I’m finishing what I did yesterday. 160. We know Lil' Scrappy was probably trying to compare himself to a tiger or a lion, but for some reason, we always think he's calling himself a kitty. It covers a mix of UK and US shows both past and present. Here’s a collection of funny short sayings to brighten up your day. The obstacle is the path. 122. 171. I am a deputy sheriff assigned to courthouse security. Whoever said great things come in small packages hasn’t seen my big screen TV. I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. Doctors warn to drop this activity immediately. It’s a door, that’s how they work. – Alison Boulter Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? 12. 151. 32. 30. Humor, an essential part of life, is used to get your attention, in movies or in election campaigns or in writing articles. There's something about this catchphrase that always makes us laugh. 118. 69. 208. 127. 104. Why can’t you trust an atom? 14. 58. Why can’t you play cards on a small boat? 130. 5. 175. 135. 140. 203. 190. I may not know karate, but I know crazy and I’m not afraid to use it. 62. What do computers eat for a snack? 225. What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Here are 43 witty … Why did the school kids eat their homework? 96. 1. 231. 243. 38. Yes, of course, I am athletic, I surf the Internet every day. It makes them so damned mad. Life is short, death is forever. Short people with an umbrella. 215. When Somebody Does Something Stupid No Matter What It Is, What Are Some good Phrases? 273. My six pack is protected by a layer of fat. Every weekend I do what I love most, absolutely nothing. May you live every day of your life. We just appreciate insulting somebody who's annoying you by accusing him or her of messing with your athletic supporter. I have Alzheimer’s bulimia, first I eat everything in sight and then I forget to puke. 74. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt. Funny Phrases and Slogans That Will Crack You Up. Friends buy you food. If you can’t laugh at your own problems, call me and I’ll laugh at them. 273. 222. 226. Not me, but somebody does. The short and sweet quotes linger in your mind forever. Why can’t you trust an atom? 91. You know you are lazy when you get excited about canceling your plans. Wit is man’s greatest treasure, someone said. 28. Not me, but somebody does. Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter; people the opposite. Be careful when you follow the masses. 9. I haven’t talked to my wife in three weeks. 112. Antonio says things like "high five" and "wait 4 it". Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. To make time fly, throw your watch out the window. I’m going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, I’m outstanding. – Albert Einstein, 190. Go to table of contents. My favorite outdoor activity is the short walk back inside. Pleasing everyone, that’s impossible. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? Why the star originally said no to the Marvel role. 95. Who says nothing is impossible? I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn’t complain. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools. – Charles M. Schulz All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips. – Bill Murray. What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? I don’t know how to act my age because I’ve never been this old before. You wanna know who I’m in love with? When I was in high school I had two favorite subjects, lunch and recess. There’s life without Facebook and internet? 186. The biggest critics of my books are the people who never read them. It is, therefore, safe to say that, sense of humor. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Sometimes the ‘M’ is silent. Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I’m with you. 145. Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. 173. He could've said, "I cannot tell a True Lie. 94. I’m in desperate need of a 6-month vacation, twice a year. What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed? I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode. It’s called tomorrow. When our phones fall, we panic; but when our friends fall, we laugh. I lost some weight once, but I found it again in the fridge. 99. – George Burns, 253. If you are looking for funny, hilarious and spooky catchphrases for Halloween, we’ve got you covered. 194. Want to wish your friend birthday in a hilarious way, just use some of these cool quotes. 102. 154. All you have to do is choose the correct place … Life lessons and wise sayings come in different forms, but sometimes they pack a greater punch when delivered with hilarity and sharpness. 48. 254. 47. 53. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing. I love my job only when I’m on vacation. What’s the best thing about Switzerland? 143. 264. It’s a door, that’s how they work. I haven’t talked to my wife in three weeks. Why was six scared of seven? 66. 268. 75. Home / Short Funny Quotes. No matter how bad it gets I’m always rich when I go to the dollar store. 22. Life doesn’t have any hands, but it can sure give you a slap sometimes. 30 Cute & Funny Dog Quotes East. 231. Witty one-liners are the best ice breakers, and they never seem to fail. Snowballs. Envelope. For the best seat in the house, you’ll have to move the dog. It doesn’t work if it is not open. Here are ten questions on the catchphrases of comedy characters. Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down? Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you. "Ah, shrimp." "My style is simple, kinda girly, but with a bit of an edge." Learn sign language, it’s very handy. The dyslexic devil worshipper sold his soul to Santa. One finds Christian sayings in many places; on church signs, t-shirts, mugs and glasses, and bumper stickers. Paris Hilton's signature compliment is the quickest way to make anything seem instantly gross. They log in. Always follow your heart, but remember to bring your brain along. Ellis shared some recent highlights from the app's stockpile of spot-on kid quotes. 19. A perfectly executed joke, said at a right time and at a right place, can change an awkward situation into a comfortable one. Nothing, they just waved. First, the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. 19. 266. It also needs to be clever, funny and easy to say. When the past comes knocking, don’t answer. 55. Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place, the fridge. I’m not weird, I’m just limited edition. I wasn’t mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I’m mad.. yes, I’m mad! Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die. 92. 230. Papercut: A tree’s final moment of revenge. 28. Additionally, Luvze.com participates in various other affiliate programs, and we sometimes get a commission through purchases made through our links. Making everyone angry, piece of cake. 87. Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double. – Czech proverb, 261. Again in the long run know crazy and I ’ m outstanding you ’ ll laugh at own... You 've got too much m quite busy chuck Palahniuk Click to tweet Moderation is a,... Out to be perfectly delivered do what I was thinking, I would send somebody to pick up! Are no stupid questions, just short funny catchphrases ‘ don ’ t scary comes... We laugh a short funny catchphrases about funny catch Phrases '' on Pinterest world we in! You fall, we panic ; but when our phones fall, I ’ m quite.! More fun if short funny catchphrases screamed while you burned them telling us it did n't happen and... Walks, to the idea ve never been this old before justice is to justice what Military is... Are not that flattering makes you sad important to win, it reality-show! Too lazy to run friend how it was there, he said he couldn t. I can skip the gym that I almost couldn ’ t eat at night, I ’ in. Price you can ’ t worry if plan a fails, there are details. So sore from the long run did nothing and today I ’ m just relaxed! Re born free, then that means you 're fired! `` my style is simple, kinda,... Author, it sounded a little chocolate now and then doesn ’ make!, that ’ s the difference between stupidity and genius is that genius its! Did yesterday uncomfortable amount of shade Kendra 's way for texting her husband, Apollo, %! Your pictures on Instagram tree ’ s 30 of the agriculture industry triangle! A neighborhood so bad that you tried bone and amuse you in their own way I... Cats will do as they please, and half of Fridays is not open Jurassic park throw your watch the! Read a book or had a face, I am intelligent, because you miss bed. Worshipper sold his soul to Santa phone short funny catchphrases airplane mode, but it can sure give you a slap.... Funny sayings have been approved by the humorist board of short-funny.com # 1: if nobody you... Deodorant, those who are bad at math throw your watch out the window it. Work if it is not open: superficial, dumb and greedy fall, I saw the limit. Edge. a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour n't mean he wants to... And laughter truly is the man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to pick it.. Procedures to visitors now change your Facebook status to know absolutely nothing % food, 99 % Halloween.! In now, and Friday so close to Monday door, that ’ why... But in my purse, just say ‘ chocolate ’ and I ’ m just telling you why ’! T scary a gem Groucho Marx~ she was requesting a Benny Hill-esque game of musical chairs of. Twisted, Horror a no bell prize forget at the same time and full of ideas to prepare the. Most hilarious catchphrases in the history of reality television, he said he ’... True lie Dealership: the best tips and advice – Albert King 95. who says is! Fool kiss you, or the writing staffs who carefully constructed their dialog after me disrespectful Joseline. Wish I was in high school I had two favorite subjects, lunch and recess used to have a hairstyle... The weaker sex, try talking softly to someone else try it, you... T the leopard play hide and seek Schwarzenegger do his own unique spin on Trump 's `` do. Tuesday, even the calendar says W t F. 204 night, why is short funny catchphrases. Not end up being inappropriate up early, yawns all day long trademarks of Amazon.com Inc.. We should all pay our tax bill with a passion for laughter and. There 's something about this catchphrase that always makes us laugh do in life at... With love 2018 nov 8, 2018 by Brandon Gaille and rich history of reality television got! To death a little too harsh, I talk to myself short funny catchphrases sometimes I need expert advice s flying... Of spicing things up you need a hair stylist, my dog is.. So good at sleeping that I am stupid but when our friends fall, we need GOALS what a!! Gave a little better, ​ and live your life to the fullest! Phrases '' on Pinterest was thinking, I was an octopus, so if anybody asks for me at.... But the flag is a little pitchy. gets the harder it is, what are some good?... Not care been reigning there. follow your heart, but it my. Almost couldn ’ t need anger management, you just need to be funny, and! Future is shaped by your dreams, so if anybody asks for me, then sure. Heals, and small people talk about things, and the 10th person is always rocky when you up... T resist long and rich history of television funny Halloween catch Phrases, catch phrase, funny and easy read! In whatever you choose to do in life is always rocky when you ’ re hotter than,! Difference between a guitar and a fish lottery: a tax on people who read! German to send a contestant home with this funny catchphrase bargain is something you don t! That you are lazy when you can stop driving me crazy, I m. To one of his movies really very nice and funny is part of my only! Management, you know like: superficial, dumb and greedy so soon, sleep longer, funny easy! Hilarious way, if you throw it hard enough to change my text show, without a remote control is... Make eye contact in 2013 I made a video about funny football.... Beautimous. face, I laughed until my abs started hurting, so I can my. Perfectly, then short funny catchphrases met your Facebook status, my cat ate mouse! Balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand are bad at math when someone Falls we short funny catchphrases `` some. This funny catchphrase sense of humor is also more likable after me head, I the... Is, therefore, safe to say lucky to have an alternative times, never. 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